On one note, Tom Glavine won his 300th game last night. This is a much bigger deal than most people think it is. We may never have another 300 game winner again. I could go into this in great detail. But I really don't want to right now. Another note...he beat the Cubs. This year, the Cubs distributed not only Glavine's 300th win, but Sosa's 600th along with a mutli-homer game to Bonds. Where was Wil Ohman when A-Rod needed him?
That's it for sports. Today, we get to talk about my festivities last night. I was in Chicago coming back to Nashville after a fine weekend. Picked up my birthday present from my parents on Friday, had a great dinner, saw a buddy's apartment, then Saturday went to a great wedding and Sunday went to the Country House. Wonderful.
Sunday evening we got to O'Hare. We got our boarding passes...which were distributed by the machine with no problem and it already said our flight was delayed. I didn't mind too much as the Cubs were on and I enjoy drinking beer. After TSA went through my girlfriend's bag and took most of everything, we were delayed again and at Chili's.
First, I am going to go into the TSA surge. Friday morning before we left, I asked my girlfriend if she was putting all of her stuff into the little plastic bags. She said no, she'd never had to before and her cosmetics, creams, female beauty stuff in general (which she doesn't need anyway) always got through in her cosmetics bag...no questions asked. Friday, much to my surprise, her theory was correct leaving Nashville as she got through unscathed from the TSA monitors. I said, alright, whatever...I'm picking up the new Rolling Stone with the original Guns N' Roses on the cover as it's the 20th anniversary of Appetite for Destruction.
But yesterday, under the precedent of Friday, she packed the same way. This time, she got stopped, and just about everything she had got taken up. My issue isn't that it gotten taken up, but the fact that it should have on Friday. Where is the consistency with this "Homeland Security" movement? As a ridiculously conservative person who recognizes that our safety is the most important thing to our country, it really chaps my backside that at some places you can get away with things and others you can't. If we are going to clamp down on searches, be consistent. Either completely regulate all operations the same way and force people to just not what to not fly commercial, or make sure the FBI, CIA, NSA, whatever, does their homework so the rest of us don't have to be bothered. Personally, I have been in some airports that make you take the plastic bag out, others that don't. If we aren't consistent, what's the point?
Moving back to Chili's, our 8:15 flight got pushed back to 9:45. We had another round. Then 10:30. At about 10 we made our way over to the gate area getting ready to board. We finally saw the people getting off the inbound flight which was a great sign as we might actually make our now 10:45 departure time.
As we start boarding I finally got to the front of the line to get my ticket scanned by the gate agent. Handing her my ticket, I knew I was in an exit row so it was going to beep an extra time to alert the agent that I had enough years on me to operate. The scanner beeped and instead of asking anything about the exit row she said, "Please step aside and see an agent."
A few hours, and a few drinks later, you can imagine I was a bit confused. Both my girlfriend and I were told to talk to her and she told me something like this, "We are having some issues with the weight of the plane. We need to have enough fuel to circle Nashville's airport a few times as they are having issues there. We have to get the calculations of the Valet bags before we can let you on. You were among the last three to make a reservation for this flight, so you might get bumped."
I'm sorry? Do we not need to reserve a seat anymore? Are the last three reservations on a flight not as valuable?
But let's analyze this. Unless everyone on the plane, who supposedly booked their tickets ahead of us is a complete idiot, how exactly would we have gotten exit row seats on an American Eagle commuter jet? These are the most coveted seats on the plane. They get sold first. Not to mention that though Nashville is growing and it's a great place to be a young professional in the business world, it's not the thriving metropolis that requires extra air space at midnight.
Our plane is now scheduled to depart at 10:50.
I've sat on runways for four hours on Thanksgiving Eve. I've been on the runway ready to take off and had to go back to the gate to kick off standby passengers because a connecting flight got in late. But this, telling ticketed passengers they might get bumped might be the worst. This is a complete lie but the stupid woman sitting behind the counter. At least tell us the truth...that you gave seats to people on the earlier canceled flight. Then, the one who gave us this information grabbed her fake Louis Vuitton purse and left, leaving Molly Ringwald and Cindy Lauper behind the counter wondering what color they should paint their toenails and what their boyfriends were going to get the for their birthdays. They obviously didn't see irate me ready to explode (not the best choice of language in the airport) upon them. When you've been waiting this long, you hope the professionals at least continue to act professional.
Finally, we are told that we can get on, but only one valet bag is allowed. I immediately declare mine and she checks the priority list and I'm on top. Boo-Yah. However, I asked, "I'll go, but is my girlfrend next on the list?" The dumbfounded gate agent was like with a really nice 'yo girlfriend' kind of charm, "Do you want to check this bag?!" And I said, "Yes, but if she's not getting on this plane neither am I. I'm not checking her, I'm checking my bag, and she's sitting in her seat that she was assigned two months ago right next to me. Check the list and make sure she's getting on this flight." The title for the Garbage hit "Stupid Girl" was still dumbfounded. Megan stepped on the jet bridge. We went down. When we got to the plane, there was no way I was gate checking my bag. The door of the little thing was shut. The flight attendant said she had no more room and my bag wouldn't fit. As Stupid Girl burned the calories of her three Cinnabon's that she obviously eats every hour on the hour got down to the plane, I was wondering what she was going to do with my bag after assuring me that calculations had come in for one more gate checked bag...the pilot finally came out saw it was a hangup and opened the closet for me. Pilots are smarter than gate agents.
So finally we are on the plane, obviously there are people who moved into our seats because they with they would have booked seats in the exit row, but must have not seen them available since we were the last ones to book our seats. They moved, reluctantly. I hate them. Then, a woman gets on the plane after us with 12B wanting me to get up from my seat and said the agent said to sit in her assigned seat. I fastened my seatbelt, showed her my ticket and said that I was willing to show as many forms of identification as possible. This got a stir out of the crowd who all was now talking about taking a run to Tootsie's once we got in. I clearly started that movement. When we pushed back from the gate, the now rowdy crowd of passengers cheered and clapped.
Moral of the story is this:
The most tragic event of American history happened via the airport. Today, we still have great issues in the airports. If there was a situation, do you think the lying gate agents at G1A could stop anything from happening? I promise you they couldn't recognize it. At least be honest and consistent with the issues that are facing your customers. People have to fly and the airlines have us by the you-know-whats. But honesty, consistency, and integrity go a long way in the world of customer service.
Consistency...Is it hypocritical that I'm supporting Mitt Romney for President in '08?
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